”I wasn’t sure if that, exactly, was what Mathilda had in mind but she certainly had my interest. “Tittilate the customers,” I asked. “Which coffee shop did you say this was?”“It’s not just one coffee shop. It’s all of them. They’re all just a bunch of smut havens.”“Well, if it’s all of them, then it sounds like what you really want is to shut down all coffee houses.”She gave me yet another of her sighs that was designed to tell me just how stupid I was. “I don’t want them to be shut down. I just want them to stop peddling their smut.”“Smut, Mrs. Gruff. Really?”“Yes, really. Those girls are sluts, and the thongs were just the beginning.”“The beginning?”Mathilda Gruff nodded emphatically. She was certainly warming to her task now. “The thongs were only the beginning. I think they’re competing with one another, trying to outdo the other and I’ve been seeing those thong girls having S-E-X.”“I see. Would that be with each other or with the. And Her VOICE was SOFT as Cotton Panties.You find PUSSY? She asked.She asked like it was a TEST of mah Knowlege.I said: YEAH. It’s what I do.She said: FOR A LIVING?I said: Nah, FOR FUN.She liked dat Response she told me lata after I had helped her find, locate and BRANG Back an ANCIENT PUSSY ARTIFACT dat Explained how Wommins Came To EARTH Before MEN!!So like I was saying.CRAYOLA BLUE (yep, thats her name cuz she liked wearing BLUE and her Mama useta work in a Crayola Factory) — had got in touch wit me thru a Nigga of a Nigga of a Nigga of ANUTHA Nigga dat I knew — and asked if I would help her with this ancient pussy artifact thang.Crayola was into collecting all dat Afrikan shit like Masks, Ivory, Clothes, Objects of Art and what not— and she heard I was one dem old, southern New Oreleans, Louisiana Niggaz dat was into da HooDoo shit.So she called me talkin bout she had an Old Collectible dealing wit da ancient Power of Pussy Essence.How old? I asked her.Bout 2,000 years old, she.
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